Judge Them First

I imagine having everything I ever said and thought recorded. I imagine it’s there for all the world to see and to scrutinize.

How deeply am I a bungling  hypocrite? How logically consistent am I really? How honest am I really? Am I really the good person I like to think that I am? Am I really the hero?

Unfortunately I am the hypocrite and the  liar and not the good hero. I blush at thinking about how much work I need.

Emotional spasm

1) Placing inordinate emphasis on the most trivial matters by reacting to shallow momentary emotional spasms are not the best grounds for developing any sort of deeper fulfillment in life and leads one to continual momentary dissatisfaction.

2) I say explore life’s deeper values and exercise the governance (not blind governance) of all deeper values in ones life while rejecting the shallow emotional reactions. Just the starting point to any sort of meaningful life: practice.

3) Balance and moderation in all things is an art: habit.

Individualism: The Me Paradigm

Has the value we’ve place on individualism actually made us less happy and view the world with more contempt?

Has this value actually made us more isolated and brought forth a bounty of depression, anxiety and suicides?

Has this value divided our relationships, our family and our communities?

Has this value been a contributor to all the polarization that we’ve been seeing in our country?

His this value made us indifferent to those around us because it is all about me, the individual? “Fuck you! Do you know what you did to me?”

Has this value caused us to place excessive emphasis on feelings/our own feelings?

Has this value eroded other values such as free speech?

Is it this value that has been caused the breakdown of the more wholesome societal  norms?

Is it even ok for me to even question such a thing without being branded and labeled as some sort of collective extremist?

The wedding 

This post is not rich in philosophical content or ideas. I believe it is a pretty typical thought process and nothing too noteworthy. However, I believe that it is important to continually define and redefine basic ideas and concepts that I hold. I see things in my life as continually changing and what I struggled with about these questions a few years ago is totally different than what I struggle with today.
As I drive home from Wisconsin to Florida after a fun (my definition of fun below) filled weekend. I reflect upon it and the importance of it in my life. Where and how should I place it?

A very light definition of how I am to finding fun and enjoy ability in context of this post.

What do I mean by fun? Are fun and enjoyable the same? For me when something is fun it falls into a goofing around category in which the cares of life I relinquish. Something the  enjoyable doesn’t quite peak the arousal scale quite as high as something that is fun but it’s a more steady state.

What does it mean to be happy? Is happiness a life lived of virtues? A life lived by principles that supersedes more primitive desires? Is it having fun and doing everything that I please? It almost seems like doing something fun would bring lasting happiness because one is always having fun. But for me this is not been the case. I am prone to panic attacks and because of this I am slightly more sensitive to my inner mental states. Usually after having too much fun I become upset with my behavior. On the other hand, the act of devoting to virtues, letting go of attachments, and living a more principle centered life leaves me more content inside. Life is less fun but more enjoyable. The downside to sacrifice is that I get bored. It’s almost paradoxical because I work on letting go of my attachments but I get bored. What am I still grasping at? What do still have attachment to?

How much balance should I have in my life? How much fun should I allow myself to have? Know thy self. It is a struggle for me because I know the importance of living a virtuous life on an individual, family, community and societal levels and the downfall of societies because of lack of virtues. I most certainly have noticed a huge shift in my behavior, my actions and my thought process which has shifted my perspective, or paradigm, about having fun and the enjoyability of life.

Where do I go from here? I guess nowhere really. I will continue on the path or the Journey of life. Hoping new insights and answers are revealed as I work and play with life.